As you can imagine, we've built up a few funny stories while we've been living here. Mostly they're related to cultural differences and not being able to speak the same language as loads of people. I'm going to try and write up any funny ones that I can think of during work and post them up here once a week or so. The main reason I want to get them written out is so that I don't forget them because some of them are actually hilarious.
The first one regards a fairly eventful taxi journey from our local city Hsinchu back to where we live Jhunan.
We went into Hsinchu one night to meet our friends. It was a fairly quiet night out but because it was midweek. We were in work till 9 so we didn't get in there until well after 10. All we did was have a bite to eat and maybe 2 beers but before we knew it it was 12 o'clock.
We went into Hsinchu one night to meet our friends. It was a fairly quiet night out but because it was midweek. We were in work till 9 so we didn't get in there until well after 10. All we did was have a bite to eat and maybe 2 beers but before we knew it it was 12 o'clock.
We thought there was trains until 12:30 so we headed back to the station at a brusque pace but not in a rush. When we arrived, we found the whole station completely closed and not a soul about. Obviously, the trains finished early during the week.
"Bollox", was the only word I could think of when I realized we'd missed the last train. Well, there were a few others but that was the pick of the bunch really.
There's a taxi rank at the station, like most stations, and this really annoying old lady kept coming up to try get us to take a taxi. Eventually, I got really annoyed and said boo yow (which is basically no in Chinese) in a fairly aggressive way but she just started laughing because I spoke Chinese. She didn't come back either way so I got the desired result! Anyway, we had hoped there would be a late bus even.
Not a chance.
So we were forced to go back to the taxi rank with our tails between out legs. I really didn't want to see the old lady again so we grabbed a taxi parked up outside the station. We thought the woman who called us in was just trying to get people in but she turned out to be the taxi driver's wife and actually sat in the front after we got in the back. "Bit weird", we thought.
The one thing that is really annoying about taxis in Taiwan is that drivers are all chewing these betel nut things. Betel nuts are basically legal drugs. It's mostly drivers (bus, taxi, truck etc…) who chew them and they're meant to be like pep pills. They keep them awake on long journeys and stuff.
"Bollox", was the only word I could think of when I realized we'd missed the last train. Well, there were a few others but that was the pick of the bunch really.
There's a taxi rank at the station, like most stations, and this really annoying old lady kept coming up to try get us to take a taxi. Eventually, I got really annoyed and said boo yow (which is basically no in Chinese) in a fairly aggressive way but she just started laughing because I spoke Chinese. She didn't come back either way so I got the desired result! Anyway, we had hoped there would be a late bus even.
Not a chance.
So we were forced to go back to the taxi rank with our tails between out legs. I really didn't want to see the old lady again so we grabbed a taxi parked up outside the station. We thought the woman who called us in was just trying to get people in but she turned out to be the taxi driver's wife and actually sat in the front after we got in the back. "Bit weird", we thought.
The one thing that is really annoying about taxis in Taiwan is that drivers are all chewing these betel nut things. Betel nuts are basically legal drugs. It's mostly drivers (bus, taxi, truck etc…) who chew them and they're meant to be like pep pills. They keep them awake on long journeys and stuff.
However, the nuts are gross and they make people a bit aggressive and hyper. Also, they have this red juice that stains the chewer's teeth and actually looks like blood. It makes them look completely insane.
So, of course, our taxi driver was chewing this crap. And it freaked us out a little.
The next kind of weird thing that happened was that he pulled in and picked up this random aul lad down the road. This aul lad happened to be going to Jhunan too it seemed. But there was already us in the back and the wife in the front. They said a load of stuff to us really fast, the wife got out and the aul lad got in. We kinda presumed she was just gonna head hack to the station - but she got in the back with us!
The whole thing was getting slightly bizarre but we weren't sure where we were so we said we'd just tough it out. The actual journey home took about 20 minutes but it felt like eternity because it turned out that our driver was actually insane.
He was chatting away to the other two and spitting out his betel juice into a cup, while driving like a bit of a maniac. Kept on jamming on the breaks at red lights we saw from miles away and flying through intersections he really should have slowed down at. Anyway, we arrive in Jhunan of sound body, if not of sound mind. So the taxi driver tells us the price, which we feel is a bit steep but fair enough.
The aul lad in the front proceeds to go mental.
He just starts shouting at the taxi driver in Chinese, the driver's shouting back with blood red teeth while at the same time trying to be relatively polite to us because he's still trying to get our money.
So, of course, our taxi driver was chewing this crap. And it freaked us out a little.
The next kind of weird thing that happened was that he pulled in and picked up this random aul lad down the road. This aul lad happened to be going to Jhunan too it seemed. But there was already us in the back and the wife in the front. They said a load of stuff to us really fast, the wife got out and the aul lad got in. We kinda presumed she was just gonna head hack to the station - but she got in the back with us!
The whole thing was getting slightly bizarre but we weren't sure where we were so we said we'd just tough it out. The actual journey home took about 20 minutes but it felt like eternity because it turned out that our driver was actually insane.
He was chatting away to the other two and spitting out his betel juice into a cup, while driving like a bit of a maniac. Kept on jamming on the breaks at red lights we saw from miles away and flying through intersections he really should have slowed down at. Anyway, we arrive in Jhunan of sound body, if not of sound mind. So the taxi driver tells us the price, which we feel is a bit steep but fair enough.
The aul lad in the front proceeds to go mental.
He just starts shouting at the taxi driver in Chinese, the driver's shouting back with blood red teeth while at the same time trying to be relatively polite to us because he's still trying to get our money.
He takes the money off us as the aul lad gets out of the taxi without paying. The driver doesn't give us any change - it was only 20 dollars but still annoying! He basically forces us out of the taxi and goes after the aul lad. The wife is still sitting in the back shouting stuff out the window after the aul lad.
We're completely bemused by the whole thing because all we can hear is shouting in Chinese and can't decipher any of it.
So we're glad to be out of the taxi but kind of linger to see what'll happen. They just stand on the street shouting at each other for ages. We can't see how it's gonna end so we eventually head off before anyone tries to involve us again.
I know the driver got some money out of him because I can remember the aul lad throwing a bit of change into the taxi before he walked off. But I've no idea if he got what he was looking for out of him after that.
I'm not sure how much he was looking for because we paid the entire amount on the bloody meter anyway!!
It was completely bizarre but pretty funny when we thought back on it. They say everything is negotiable in Taiwan but it seems like this taxi driver drove a harder bargain than most.
We're completely bemused by the whole thing because all we can hear is shouting in Chinese and can't decipher any of it.
So we're glad to be out of the taxi but kind of linger to see what'll happen. They just stand on the street shouting at each other for ages. We can't see how it's gonna end so we eventually head off before anyone tries to involve us again.
I know the driver got some money out of him because I can remember the aul lad throwing a bit of change into the taxi before he walked off. But I've no idea if he got what he was looking for out of him after that.
I'm not sure how much he was looking for because we paid the entire amount on the bloody meter anyway!!
It was completely bizarre but pretty funny when we thought back on it. They say everything is negotiable in Taiwan but it seems like this taxi driver drove a harder bargain than most.
